Payday Loans: A Haiku Collection

Work is much more exhausting now that the new girl has been fired. With just my boss and me running the store, the only days on which both of us are there are Monday and Friday, with the rest of the week a weird hodgepodge of us working tiring and lonely days alone. Today I was so moved by my boredom and distinterest in studying for final exams next week that I wrote a series of work-inspired haiku and now I’m on another haiku bingefest:

Defaulted on loan
Now you can’t get a mortgage
[company] wins again

Para Español
Bring a friend who speaks English
We’re all gringos here

Valley View State Bank
Pretends to verify but
Never faxes back

Ma’am, a sob story
Won’t prove to me that you’re paid
Only once a month

Service with a smile
Boss says it’s a facade but
Maybe I’m just nice

Forgot to pay loan
Didn’t know check was returned
Sure I believe you

Low carb bonanza
Boss thinks I only eat grass
Not so, eat eggs too

The KC Fax Times
Consider unsubscribing
But we’re too lazy

Fraudulent ComCheks
Make me and boss want to die
Grateful for our jobs

New job applicant
Can’t spell, write, or punctuate
Don’t you dare hire her

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